Pippa Middleton has written a bizarre explanation about cricket. (Photo by Clive Brunskill/Getty Images) Source: Getty Images
AS A writer earning something of a reputation for stating the obvious, Pippa Middleton was always going to be on a sticky wicket trying to explain cricket to the Americans.
The younger sister of the future Queen and aunt to Prince George already has a spoof Twitter account dedicated to poking fun at her overhelpful observations in her party-planning book Celebrate.
Pictures: Pippa Middleton
But, in her latest dispatch as a columnist-at-large for US magazine Vanity Fair , she has become a parody even of herself in her attempts to explain how the sport works.
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Described as a "boundary babe" in the blurb accompanying the article Pippa, 29, is pictured clad in cricketer's cap, Victorian whites and equipment in a batting pose at the wicket. "An attempt to explain the rules would go something like this," she writes in the article headlined "Lord's and a Lady".
"A batsman goes out and is then in until he gets out. This goes on until the last batsman is out, apart from one who is still in and therefore not out."
If this is not enough to baffle American readers, she goes on to send shudders down the spine of any Wisden-loving Englishman by suggesting the rules don't really matter anyway.
She writes: "In my experience, it's safer not to pretend to know the rules and just take pleasure in the visual spectacle - not only the men in flannelled whites (though this does help) but also the ageless trappings and the sense of Englishness about it all."
Pippa, who has had her fair share of watching the game from the boundary during her one-and-a-half year romance with former England all-rounder and Etonian Alex Loudon, adds she has all the right credentials to break down the sport for the uninitiated.
Pippa Middleton (C) mother Carole and Alex Loudon back in 2011. Source: AP
"As a former member of the cricket WAGs, I have many happy memories of afternoons spent lying on the grass and hearing the satisfying clunk of leather ball on willow bat," she writes, apparently referencing her relationship with Loudon that ended in 2011.
She adds: "From Imran Khan to England's current captain, Alastair Cook, there is a tradition of the sultry cricketer powering in from the boundary ... tousled hair blowing in the breeze."
Pippa has previously been criticised for her "glaringly obvious" observations in her book - such that turkeys, "because of their size … are perfect for feeding larger gatherings".
The parody Twitter account, @pippatips, offers spoof advice such as: "Enjoy a glass of water by getting a clean glass and pouring in water from a tap or bottle. If you like cold water, add ice."
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