Pre-teen sexual activity 'normal'

Flirting and kissing with peers at a young age is no cause for alarm, but more serious sexual activity can be a worry. Source: The Daily Telegraph

SEXUAL activity among 11 and 12-year-olds - including those of the same sex - is normal, a new Federal Government report claims.

The Australian Centre for the Study of Sexual Assault has listed "peer-related sexual activity" as "developmentally appropriate" for pre-teen children aged 11 and 12.

And it states that sexual activity between kids of the same sex does not mean they are homosexual.

The "developmentally appropriate sexual behaviours" are listed in a new report revealing big brothers are five times more likely than fathers or uncles to sexually abuse young children.

But the Australian Institute of Family Studies - which controls the Centre for the Study of Sexual Assault - is insisting that "sexual activity" does not refer to sex.

"Everyone knows that sexual activity does not mean penetrative sex," the institute's head of research, Daryl Higgins, said yesterday.

"Everyone who has done research in the field knows it is a broad range of things, from kissing to flirting."

Dr Higgins said the list of  appropriate and inappropriate sexual behaviours for children of various ages was a summary of research studies, and "not advice to  parents".

However child protection group Bravehearts yesterday said the list was "a  bit misleading".

"They probably needed to explain that a little bit better," Bravehearts research manager Carol Ronken said.

"At that age, exploration is  perfectly normal - it's the  old 'first-base' thing with kissing, but not actual penetrative sex."

The federally funded incest report reveals that most parents usually ignore, deny or downplay sibling sexual abuse as child's play.

Little sisters are the usual victims, but often won't dob in their abusive brothers for fear of "rocking the boat".

"Sibling abuse is an under-reported and hidden crime," the report says.

"(It) has historically been ignored, minimised or denied by parents, professionals and authorities as benign sexual experimentation."

"(But) studies indicate that sibling sexual abuse is more prevalent than other types of intra-familial sexual abuse."

Siblings are three to five times more likely than parents, grandparents or aunts and uncles to sexually abuse a child, the report says.

Brothers are the most common abusers, targeting a sister or brother typically five years younger.

Siblings often used their hands and feet to subdue the victim, or used verbal coercion, threats, bribery or trickery.

About eight in every 10 victims are younger than 13, the study says, but many fear telling their parents.

Dr Higgins urged parents to  seek counselling for all  their children if they suspected abuse.

"The most important thing is not to flip out," he said.

"The first temptation for parents is to turn a blind eye that it's a bit of experimental mucking around.

"Often it takes young people three or four or five times before they're believed and action is taken."

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>> What's "developmentally appropriate"

0-5 years - Exploratory touch. Looking at themselves and others.

6-10 years - Playing games such as "doctors and nurses". Telling dirty jokes and using dirty words. Showing interest in changes in their bodies.

11-12 years - Masturbation. Peer related sexual activity. Sexual activity with same gender ... not regarded as indicating homosexuality.

>> What's not

0-5 years - Obsessive preoccupation with sexual behaviour. Re-enacting adult sexual activities. Behaviour involves self injury or coercion, threats, secrecy, violence and aggression.

6-10 years - Sexual penetration, genital kissing, oral copulation, simulated intercourse.

11-12 years - any sexual play with a younger child.

13-18 - Compulsive masturbation, attempt to touch or expose other's genitals, sexual contact with animals and younger children, using sexual themes to degrade others or themselves, chronic preoccupation with sex and pornography.

Source: Australian Centre for the Study of Sexual Assault research summary on sibling sexual abuse.

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